What if you knew that by giving the right reward to the right person, you would be able to radically improve the dynamic in your personal and professional relationships?
It is important to not only understand other’s receiving genius but also to understand your own. When you understand your receiving genius it makes teaching people how to treat you (reward you) far easier. When we are properly rewarded we feel that we belong, it raises our self-esteem, self-worth and our confidence. It also offers us the opportunity for more self-actualization and this in-turn frees us to feel seen, heard, valued, recognized and loved. This experience of authentic giving and receiving is where we can feel truly fulfilled…
Conversely, If we end up missing the mark when rewarding others it leaves us wondering why we are not getting the response we had expected. This can cause anger and resentment in both parties. When in fact the efforts were not unnoticed or unappreciated, they were just rewarded in the wrong currency.
Once you understand and can speak the reward language of those around you the door to giving and receiving is easily unlocked. This allows for a much better use of time, energy and effort both personally and professionally to reach the goal at hand and to help others feel the intended intention of our efforts. When we learn the art of giving and receiving we are empowered to truly have a positive impact on everyone on our team.
Connection & Meaning (CM)
A person whose primary reward language is Connection and Meaning is looking for depth and substance in people, projects and their career. If this is you, give yourself a pat on the back from time to time. Make eye contact during conversations and forge sincere relationships. Don’t give up on what matters to you and gives meaning to your life. Care about others but don’t neglect your own emotional needs in the process. Completely commit to the task at hand and recognize your achievements even if others fail to. This connection between your time, energy and effort to the purpose and how it connects you to that purpose and meaning is critical in order for you to feel as you wish. When working with a team or company, stay present, accessible and connected. Promote harmonious interactions at all levels. The way your energy shows up and how you physically interact with others plays a huge role in what type of relationships or connections you foster. Build confidence and a strong sense of security within yourself. This will attract deep and meaningful connections in your life. The deeper you can go in your own self discovery the deeper you will attract and foster that same level with others.
Awards – Titles – Prizes (ATP)
To some people, awards, titles and prizes mean the world to them. It’s the only way they feel appreciated and valued. But do not mistake this Receiving Genius to mean they are materialistic. To better understand this receiving genius you must first start with why the award, title, prize has meaning to them. This is the evidence or proof they point to, that brings them the feeling of value and reward. It is not so much the actual award but what it represents that holds the key to this receiving genius. When you have a person on your team whose receiving genius os Awards, Titles, Prizes you can provide them with challenges and rewards to get the best out of them and give them what they need most to be their best. Acknowledging their accomplishments publicly is a big yes, privately is nice but it won’t have as much impact. Maximize your influence as a leader and motivate this person with the right reward. This will have a direct effect on your bottom line. If this is your reward language, then work towards getting that highest sales trophy or strive for that promotion you deserve. Excellence is in everything you do, and it is key to getting awarded and recognized. Grab opportunities to address public forums and mentor young minds. Participate in competitions and debates, and push hard to win. Put yourself on a pedestal in your own mind. Recognize your achievements and share them publicly. Let others know about the goals you’ve met and the projects you’ve completed. Don’t shy away from putting yourself out there. For people whose primary reward language is Awards, Titles and Prizes, getting publicly recognized is what truly gives them a sense of achievement. This fuels them to shine even more, brighter and connect to those cheering them on. Constantly strive to keep yourself at the forefront of any race and inspire, encourage and support others who wish to do the same.
Acknowledgement & Recognition (AR)
They say that actions speak louder than words but, those who speak this reward language will firmly disagree. For these folks words matter and they matter in a very big way. If this is your reward language, compliments mean the world to you. You are looking for the words and validation for the value of your contribution, talent and time. Bask in the glory of your achievements. Put them out there for the world to see. Put in extra effort or time, and go above and beyond on a task. Make people privy to your ideas and impress them with your plans. Don’t take criticism to heart; instead help others understand how the power of positive reinforcement works better for you. Brush off any negative self talk and stride toward your next big goal. Use affirmation and meditation tools to fill your mind with the acknowledgment and recognition for the glorious gifts you bring into our world. Be kind, encouraging and positive toward yourself to send your spirits skyward. Positive feedback will make you work harder and be more committed to the job/goal. At the end of every day, recount all the good work you did to boost your confidence and happiness quotient. Keeping a gratitude journal will help record all the amazing things happening around you. Your ability to connect with your own self image can make the difference between success and failure. The stronger you can recognize and acknowledge your own voice, needs and desires, the more you will attract others who will also mimic this same reward language back to you. For the person on your team whose receiving genius is Acknowledgement and Recognition, a well written speech is your power tool, a nickname that acknowledges their talent is a constant positive reinforcement of your appreciation of them…
Focus and Attention (FA)
Nothing delivers a feeling of reward like giving these folks your full, undivided focus and attention. If this is your receiving genius , proactively reach out to mentors who’s opinion you value to voice your concerns and provide them with the opportunity to give you the focus and attention you seek. Ask for help in learning anything new. Solicit the undivided attention of people you work with when discussing important matters. Instead of bringing concerns up in a casual setting where anyone can chime in, set the stage for uninterrupted attention and 100% energy and focus during one-on-one interactions. Give others undivided attention during conversations as well, so others will get the cue to do the same with you. This means not using your phone or multi tasking while they are sharing their time with you. Focused, solo, one-on-one time is what counts. Avoid distractions, postponements, or the failure to listen as people might when being tempted to do the same. Value yourself and others on the team. Take time out for yourself everyday to indulge in activities you enjoy without interruption. The best way to master this receiving genius is to first gift yourself the focus and attention you need to be your highest and best self. Move you up the priority list and as you make yourself a priority others will respect this act and do the same. Practice asking for focus and demonstrating focus. Help others set healthy boundaries and guidelines to share the time and attention people are starving for. For the person on your team whose receiving genius is focus and attention, you can plan one hour a week for one on one time. You can initiate focus time with them by adding it the agenda of a business trip. Putting it on the agenda shows how much you value their productivity, because you know focus and attention gives them the self esteem they need to perform at their best.
Actions & Service (AS)
Can bringing someone documents from the printer really be an expression of reward and demonstrate that you value them? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on those with this reward language will speak volumes to them. If this is you, get help, literally. Get people to help you out with chores. When people say; let me do that for you; let them. Nine out of ten times when a person asks, “How can I help you?” they mean it. Use the opportunity to take an action item off your to-do list. Demand quality work from people on your team or those reporting to you. Any type of laziness, broken commitments, or in any way increasing your burden of work should not be accepted. People with the Actions and Service receiving genius receiving tend to be the overachievers and those who take way more than is humanly possible. Learn the powerful art of saying “no” even mastering the soft no, with statements like “this doesn’t work for me or now is not the best time for me to commit to this” For this person it’s all about learning to ask for and accept help. When you do your spirit will burst with joy. If this is someone on your team offer to help them, offer an assistant, or an intern. Next time you see them stressed out ask them what is the one thing you wish someone else could do for you. Whatever they say; if it’s arrange my dog sitter or prepare the graphs for my presentations work it out for them and you will build trust and loyalty right there on the spot. You will also see their sense of security rise and their productivity along with it. Whether this is you or someone on your team make sure to reward every time you/they resist resist the temptation to over commit and stress out. . They will need positive reinforcement that being stressed out is not a marker of productivity. Being able to delegate and receive actions of service is a marker of productivity and of success.